Loss and Gain
by milesprower06
Summary: After a tragic and devastating loss, Takato goes to see a psychiatrist to search within himself and try to find the will to go on.
1. Prologue

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Prologue

Takato stood on a street corner in busy downtown Tokyo. He had his regular everyday clothes on – blue short-sleeve hoody, khaki pants rolled up at the ankles; but he didn't bring his goggles with him – he didn't really know why he left them at home. Standing in front of a door to a psychologist's office, he wondered how it had all led to this. At first glance, it all seemed so fast. His mind couldn't make sense of it; he didn't understand. Then again, that's why he was here; to try and unravel everything. He turned the doorknob, and walked inside. He walked to the front desk and told the receptionist he had an appointment. She checked the books, confirmed, and led him to a medium sized room. There was a fine oak desk in front of the small window, and the paint and fixtures gave it a relaxing atmosphere. At the desk, sat Dr. Morgan, the psychologist that Henry had recommended to him. She wore silver glasses, had long, graying hair, and was in her 50s. Various diplomas and framed qualifications hung on the wall behind her. She looked up at him, and greeted him warmly.

"Hello, Takato. I'm Dr. Morgan. Please, make yourself comfortable" she said, making a light hand gesture toward the couch. He nodded, smiling lightly at her. Smiling…something he hadn't done genuinely in awhile. He was a wreck, and he knew he needed to get himself some help. So here he was. He lay out on the black leather couch, resting his head on a pillow on the armrest. Dr. Morgan took her place in a chair a few feet away. "So, what's troubling you?" she asked in a soothing manner.

"I – I don't even know where to start" Takato replied. "Take your time. How about at the beginning?" she suggested. Takato thought deeply. The beginning…where everything started to go wrong…

The beginning of this mess would have to be shortly after the D-Reaper crisis. It started with Jeri…

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Takato still had trouble thinking about it. She seemed to be on the road to recovery – she even forgave Impmon for what he had done. But…when the digital pathways opened again and the tamers' Digimon returned, and when Leomon didn't, she began to fall back into despair again…knowing that he was gone for good…that last fleeting hope defeated. Three days later, her dad found her pale in her bed. She had died in her sleep, overdosed on some street drug. The autopsy revealed that she had taken over three times the largest suggested dose; they reported it as intentional suicide. Takato had a hard time believing that. He didn't go to the funeral, but he eventually got up the courage to visit her grave, and did so several times.

But a Tamer never stays still for long. With the digital gates open again, wild Digimon began to appear around the world. Kazu and Kenta moved to North America, so they did their job over there. Ryo returned to the Digital World with Cyberdramon, and Suzie wasn't much for fighting with Lopmon, so it had returned to just Takato, Henry, and Rika, with Guilmon, Terriermon, and Renamon at their sides. There were several hundred Tamers all over the world, and their D-Arcs had limited range, so up until then, the three of them just traveled around Tokyo. But, several weeks later, Rika's D-Arc picked up a signal from Egypt…a signal that would change everything…


	2. Tomb Tamers

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 1 – Tomb Tamers

Takato headed out the back door of his house with Guilmon and immediately ran into Rika.

"I picked up a signal from Egypt." she said. "Egypt? Our D-Arcs don't have that kind of range" Takato replied. "I know. At least they're not supposed to. Henry pinpointed it, and it's a few miles outside of Cairo. Henry and I think we should check it out" Rika said. "But there are Tamers in Cairo" he replied. "Yes, but when Henry contacted them, none of them had gotten any signal from their D-Arcs. This signal is coming to us and us alone. There has to be a reason. Are ya up for it?" she asked him. "Yeah, why not?" he said. "Alright. Since Digimon aren't allowed on commercial flights, we got in touch with a charter pilot who's willing to fly us there and back for a reasonable price. We leave in a few hours. Pack what you need." she said. "Alright. Let me know when you're ready to go" Takato said. Rika left, and he and Guilmon went back in the house and up to his room to pack.

"Where's Egypt?" Guilmon asked. "In the middle east. Its mostly desert. It can get quite hot. In ancient times, the people who lived there built tombs and pyramids to bury their kings in" Takato told him. He went over to a globe, spun it over to that region, and pointed to Egypt. "That's where we're going," he said to his partner. Guilmon stared at the globe curiously. "Looks really small. How are we gonna fit in there?" he asked. Takato snickered. "No, no. This is a globe. It's Earth in very, very small form" he said. Explaining things to Guilmon could get quite humorous at times.

A few hours later, the three of them met up at Shinjuku Airfield, where their pilot and plane were waiting. The pilot fueled up the plane while they boarded. Guilmon was a bit big for the seats, so he had to ride below in the cargo hold, so during the flight, Takato sat alone. As the flight went on, the signal on their D-Arcs got constantly stronger. During the flight, Rika noticed that Takato had been awfully quiet, keeping to himself. She got up, and went and sat next to him. "You alright? Hey, I'm sure Guilmon's fine down there" she reassured him, assuming she knew what was bothering him. "No…no, it's not that" Takato said, glancing at her. He took a breath, and gazed out the window. "I was thinking about Jeri," he said quietly. "I mean…maybe I could've done more to help her." he said. "It wasn't your fault," Rika began. "When our Digimon came back, she put on a smile whenever she was around us – nobody knew she was slipping away again" Rika told him gently, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I know. She acted fine when we were around, but why didn't any of us see through that? Why didn't I…?" he said. "There are some things in this world you can't help, Takato. There are some mysteries we never solve." she said. Takato looked at her, and slowly nodded. "Yeah, maybe you're right" she said. The two of them sat next to each other for the remaining hours of the flight.

They landed in an airstrip outside of Cairo, and they discovered that Guilmon had gotten into a crate of food in the cargo hold. "Never let him get bored." Takato mumbled. The three of them chuckled. It was high noon, and they hiked out into the Egyptian dunes a few miles, tracking the signal out into the desert. They drank plenty of water, and made sure they had plenty in reserve before they got out too much further.

As the sun began its descent, they saw a pyramid in the distance, and assumed that the source of the signal was somewhere inside. They made their way up to the tomb's entrance. They had packed flashlights, but quickly discovered that the tomb's ancient mirror lighting system provided the halls and chambers with decent light no matter what time of day it was, as long as the sun was up; which meant they only had an hour or so of natural light left before they had to resort to their flashlights. They made their way through the tomb's halls, following the signal, which was getting incredibly strong. "The power levels are nearly off the chart," Henry began. "I think this is gonna be stronger than nearly anything we've dealt with before" he said.

They came to a medium sized room; an alter. Two unlit torch bowls on pillars were on either side of a small, three-stair staircase. The source of the signal, which was now off the charts, was emitting from an open portal in front of the alter, at the top of the stairs.

"It hasn't come out yet" Henry said. "Then let's close that portal before it does." Rika said. As Henry raised his D-Arc to close the portal, a black-armored being leapt out of the dimensional tear. All three of them recognized the fearsome Digimon from the TV series.

"BlackWarGreymon!" all three said in unison.

The antithesis of WarGreymon wasted no time. He charged, first at Henry, knocking him against a wall. He fell to the stone floor, but recovered quickly.

"We have to Biomerge!" Rika exclaimed.

But they couldn't. Since the D-Reaper crisis ended and the Digimon returned, they hadn't been able to Biomerge. All three of them realized this.

"We'll have to do what we can," Takato said. All three of them slashed Digivolve cards.

"Renamon…digivolve to…Kyubimon!"

"Terriermon…digivolve to…Gargomon!"

Guilmon began to digivolve, but when BlackWarGreymon started to attack him, Guilmon had to interrupt his own digivolving process in order to evade the attack.

BlackWarGreymon unleashed a Terra Destroyer energy ball straight at Takato. He dove to the floor to avoid it. It impacted on the other side of the room, reducing a wall to rubble. They knew that their Digimon would have to digivolve again if they had any chance of forcing BlackWarGreymon back through the portal. Rika and Henry slashed two Matrix Digivolution cards.

"Kyubimon… matrix digivolve to…Taomon!"

"Gargomon…matrix digivolve to…Rapidmon!"

Takato was still getting up from his dive to the floor; he was in no position to activate another card yet. BlackWarGreymon was in perfect position to be pushed back into the portal.

Taomon took position.

"Talisman of Light!" she called out her attack, and began painting a hieroglyph in midair. Takato got to his feet, but couldn't see Guilmon. Then, he saw BlackWarGreymon throw another Terra Destroyer attack at him. Suddenly, he felt someone knock him out of the way. Hard. As he fell to the floor, he turned to look. Taomon's attack closed in on BlackWarGreymon. It was Guilmon who shoved him to the floor, out of harm's way, and was now in the path of BlackWarGreymon's Terra Destroyer.

There was no avoiding it. It was too close.

Upon impact, the intense heat washed over Takato. He was three feet away when he saw his creation, his partner, his friend, dissipate into a billion fragments…


	3. Deja Vu

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 2 – Déjà Vu

"Guilmon!!!"

Taomon's Talisman of Light shoved BlackWarGreymon back toward the portal, but it was going to need more push. Rapidmon took aim.

"Rapid fire!" he called out his attack, and two missiles homed in and hit BlackWarGreymon, knocking him back through the portal. Rika immediately aimed her D-Arc, and a bright blue beam shot out and hit the portal, forcing it to decrease in size and eventually close.

Rapidmon and Taomon reverted back to their rookie levels. "Takato!" Rika yelled, running toward him. He was on the ground, but appeared conscious. When she knelt down next to him, he didn't notice her. "Takato…?" she asked. Henry came closer and knelt down. He took out his flashlight, turned it on, and turned it toward Takato's eyes. His pupils were almost completely contracted. He felt for his pulse.

"He's in shock" Henry diagnosed. "But why?" Rika asked. That's when Henry first noticed someone was missing. "Where's Guilmon?" he asked. They looked around the room. There was no sign of him. They thought back to the battle that just took place. BlackWarGreymon had attacked with the Terra Destroyer three times. The first one Guilmon avoided; the second one Takato dove to the floor; and the third…

"No…" Rika said, barely above a whisper. Not again. Not Takato. Renamon and Terriermon stood next to their respective tamers, but they too showed concern for Takato and the apparent fate of his partner.

"Guilmon…" Takato whispered, but otherwise was completely silent. "Takato, can you hear me?" Henry asked. Takato gave no reply. "He'll eventually snap out of it. Come on, we've gotta go" Henry said. "But-" Rika began to say. "There's nothing more we can do here. We can help him back home" he said. The two of them helped Takato up, and he was still somewhat conscious, as he stood and walked on his own. Darkness flooded the halls as the sun went below the horizon outside. Rika and Henry grabbed their flashlights and switched them on. They made their way out of the tomb and back into the desert night. It was a good deal colder, so they hurried back several miles to the airfield. The plane and pilot were waiting. He opened the passenger door, and was about to open the cargo hold, when he noticed that Guilmon wasn't there.

"Hey, where's the red-"

Rika immediately gave him a 'drop it' look, and shook her head. The pilot said no more, and they got on the plane. The engine started up, the plane took off, and they were on their way back home. Rika sat next to Takato the entire way home, in case he came out of shock. He did not. He sat silent the whole way home. When they landed in Shinjuku, they all debarked, and Takato, even in his current state, apparently knew his way home. He left without a word. Neither Rika nor Henry slept well that night. The last thing they wanted was a repeat of what happened to Jeri.

First thing the next morning, Rika phoned the Matsuki residence. Takato's mom answered, and she asked for Takato. She said he hadn't stirred since last night, and didn't think he was in any condition to talk to anyone, and that she'd call Rika if there was any change. Rika thanked her, and hung up. Henry called her, and she told him what Mrs. Matsuki told her. They both felt uneasy. But, with what happened to Jeri, they had faith that his parents would keep a close eye on him.

Rika didn't hear anything for three days. On the third day after they got back, Rika got a call from his mom asking her to come over. She went over there right away. She knocked on the front door. Takato's mom answered the door. "Rika. Thanks for coming." she said. "Mrs. Matsuki" Rika greeted. The two of them went to the dining room and sat down at the table. His mom got right to the point.

"He hasn't spoken a word since he got back. He hasn't come out of his room; he's barely eaten anything. He's hardly slept at all; he keeps on having nightmares. I'm worried sick about him. When he came back without Guilmon, I assumed what happened." she said. There was a pause. Rika looked down at the table, breaking eye contact with his mom, and slowly nodded, confirming what happened in Egypt. "We all know what happened to Jeri. I thought it best to call you" she said. Rika nodded. "I'll do the best I can." she said. "Thank you" his mom replied. Rika slowly got up and walked up the stairs to Takato's closed bedroom door. She knocked softly. "Takato?" she asked. With no reply, she slowly opened the door. The light was off, but the sun provided some dim light. She immediately saw Takato in bed, still in his clothes, half curled up, facing the wall. "Hey, Takato. How are you feeling?" she asked. The single window, usually open, was closed, so the bustling noise usually heard was shut out, and the room was left eerily silent.

Takato didn't reply. She slowly walked over to his bedside, and knelt down. She put a hand on his shoulder. He rolled over and looked at her. Rika was taken slightly aback.

He looked awful; like someone who hadn't slept or eaten in three days. "Let's get you something to eat." she said. "Not hungry" he replied dully. "Well, you should at least try and get some sleep" she suggested. "Can't sleep. It's the same nightmare again and again." he said. "Takato, I know it hurts now, but-" Takato rolled back over. "Staying in here forever won't bring him back." Rika said. Takato quickly rolled back over toward her and sat up. "I know that! He's gone!" he yelled at her. Suddenly, he looked uneasy.

His eyes widened. This was the breaking point. He had to hear himself say it. "He's…he's gone" he said softer. Tears fell from his eyes. "He's gone, Rika" he said again, his voice shaking now. Rika sat down next to him on the bed and hugged him. He broke down, sobbing on her shoulder. She sat there and embraced him while he let out the loss of his friend. Rika couldn't imagine how this felt. And she hoped she never did.

After several minutes, Takato calmed down considerably. He stood up with Rika. "Alright, let's go downstairs. Your mom's really worried about you." she said. He sniffled, nodded, and followed her downstairs. His mom was waiting at the bottom of the stairs. She hugged him. "Are you alright, kiddo?" she asked. "I don't know," he replied, returning the embrace. "I'm…sorry I shut you out" he apologized. "Don't worry about it, hon. Listen, you take as much time as you need to deal with this. If you ever need us, we're here for you" she said. "Thanks for coming by, Rika" Mrs. Matsuki told her. "Don't mention it. I'll stick around, if it's alright with you" she said. "It's fine with me if it's fine with you, Takato" his mom said. Takato nodded. "I'll get some lunch started" Mrs. Matsuki said.

Takato's mom prepared a quick lunch. They all sat down at the dining room table and started their meal. Takato ate slowly and silently, but nonetheless ate. When they were done, Mrs. Matsuki continued baking, and Rika and Takato went back up to his room. They didn't really do much of anything, but Rika didn't mind at all – right now, all Takato needed was friends by his side. When dusk neared, Rika decided that she'd better be headed home. On her way out the door, Takato called after her. "Hey, Rika?" he asked. "Yeah?" she replied. "Would you like to come by tomorrow?" he asked. "Sure. See you tomorrow, then" she said, and left. She was happy that Takato asked her to come over tomorrow; it was a sign that he wasn't shutting himself away – but she was also praying he wasn't putting on an act like Jeri did…


	4. Road To Recovery

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 3 – Road to Recovery

Since she was still a little worried about Takato, Rika didn't get as good a night's sleep as she wanted. She got up the next morning, got dressed, packed a backpack, and told her mom and grandmother that she was spending the day with Takato. She had a few plans for him that she thought of last night, too.

Although she didn't want to move him too fast, she thought that the next step would be to get him out of the house. She got over to his house at eleven, and went over to the side door. His mom answered. "Hey, Rika" she said. "Hi, Mrs. Matsuki. How's he doing?" she asked. "I don't think he did too well last night. I heard him roaming around his room several times last night." his mom replied. That was going to be another challenge: getting his nightmares to stop. It wasn't going to do any good if Rika came over everyday, and have him just revert because of these repeating nightmares. "He did come down for breakfast though. I think he's waiting for you upstairs" she said. Rika went up to his room and knocked on the door, and then opened it. Takato was still in his pajamas, sitting at his desk, staring out the window. He turned to look. He still looked bad, but he was much worse yesterday. Now that he was eating again, it was starting to at least do some good.

"Hey there. Sleep well?" Rika asked. He shook his head, saying nothing. Rika noticed his D-Arc and his goggles on the back corner of his desk, and an open tin under his bed, which had the first drawings and stats of Guilmon. That was another thing – having his D-Arc was always going to be a reminder of his identity as a Tamer, and of Guilmon; which is probably why those drawings were in the tin under his bed. But in the end, he couldn't just forget about Guilmon; he had to accept his death and move on; but how? That wasn't easy to answer. Takato and Guilmon were the closest Tamer and partner Rika had ever seen – and he'd been a Tamer for half the time that she was with Renamon.

She was getting ahead of herself; one step at a time. "I was thinking you and I could go out for lunch, if you want" she said. "Where?" he asked. "Out by the lake. I've got sandwiches packed already" she said. "If you already have food packed, why ask?" he replied. "Cause you don't have to go if you don't want to. It's up to you." she said. Takato eventually nodded. "Alright. Yeah." he said. "Cool. I'm ready whenever you are" Rika said. "Let me change and I'll meet you downstairs" he said. Rika nodded, and left. Downstairs, she told his mom where they were headed. "Thank you so much for doing this for him" she told Rika. "It's no problem; really. You have a wonderful son, Mrs. Matsuki, and I'll help him through this however I can" she said. A few minutes later, Takato came down in a clean hoody and pants. 'How many pairs of those does he have?' Rika thought to herself. Oh well, she had more than one set of her favorite clothes. "Ready to go?" Rika asked. Takato nodded. They walked to the front door. "Have a good time, you two" his mom called after them.

They walked several blocks until they got out of the downtown area, and came to the park. It was a risk, bringing Takato here so soon, but she felt it was one she had to take. This was the most peaceful place you could go without going 20 miles out of Shinjuku. Takato wasn't really talkative, but she wasn't expecting that yet. They sat at the lakeside, and ate. Afterwards, they just sat at the lakeshore. "I guess I never took the time to take in the scenery of this place. It's really beautiful." Takato said, laying back on the grass. "Yeah, me neither," she said, laying back with him. "People don't really stop to take in nature anymore" she said.

Suddenly, her D-Arc began beeping. 'Oh no' she thought. Why did she even bring it with her? She unclipped it from her belt and looked at it. It was a proximity warning – a wild Digimon; a few miles away. Then, she did something that truly surprised Takato – she switched her D-Arc off and put it in her pocket. "Are you ill? Go on" he said to her. "Nah. Henry's closer to it. He'll take care of it." she said. "Rika, you don't need to stay here because I wanted you to come over again" he said.

"You're right. I don't. But I want to, not only because you asked me to come over, but I wanted to spend the day with you, too. You're my priority now" she said, giving him a friendly slug on his arm. After an awkward pause, he gave her a slight smile. "Thanks, Rika" he said. "Don't mention it" she replied. The sun was beginning to go down, so the two of them headed back to Takato's house. When they got there, it was nearly dark. They stood by the side door. "Thanks. I had a good time today" he said. "Yeah, I did too" Rika replied. Takato stepped forward to give her a friendly hug, but Rika did something he never saw coming. As he embraced her, she leaned her head forward, and her lips met his. She kissed him briefly, and then broke from the embrace. Her face was a few shades redder, as was Takato's.

"Good night, Takato" she said, smiled, and then turned and left the side alley. He stood there for almost a minute. "Good night, Rika" he said to himself. He opened the door and went inside.

On her way home, Rika's mind was going in a hundred directions at once. She had never shown that kind of affection to anyone before. She didn't even think about it. It just…happened.

"What was that all about?" Renamon said from behind, out of nowhere. Rika's face turned red again. She kept walking, knowing that her Digimon kept pace behind her, and could tell she was caught off-guard. "You've got some nerve, Renamon. Spying on me like that" she said. "I know. But the fact that you've never ignored a wild proximity signal prompted me to see what was going on." she said. "I'm helping him" she said immediately. "Yes, but that…seemed like a bit more than help there at the end" Renamon replied. "Do you mind?" Rika said. "Not at all," her partner replied. "It's just that I've never seen this side of you before, Rika. I'm pretty sure Takato hasn't either." she said. "Yeah, I know. Neither have I. It just…happened…you know?" she said. She was nearing her house. "I understand Rika, but you have to be sure that you have those kind of feelings for him. Otherwise, when you've helped him through this, and things get close to normal again, you may just end up hurting him" she said.

Rika didn't reply. Renamon had been her partner for too long for Rika to just ignore her advice. She did have a point, after all. Yes, it happened, but what was she going to do about it? What if it came up when she went over there again? She walked through the front gate to her house. She'd sleep on it…


	5. The Awkward Moment

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 4 – The Awkward Moment

Rika knocked at Takato's side door. His mom answered. "Hey, Rika. Nice of you to come by again. Takato's upstairs" she said. "Thanks, Mrs. Matsuki" Rika said, and then went up the stairs. She knocked on Takato's bedroom door and opened it. Takato was lying in his bed, clothes still on, facing away from her. Rika saw something on the floor at the side of his bed, and her heart dropped into her stomach.

Needles and syringes. A dozen of them.

Rika ran to his bedside, and shook him. "Takato" she said. No reply. She rolled him over, and dreaded at what she saw. His face was deathly pale – his hands cold; eyes closed. Rika's mind went into panic mode. No no no no no no no no no no no no-

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Rika awoke with a start. She breathed heavily, and it took her a few seconds to take in her surroundings. She was in her room. She looked at her clock. 11:30 PM. She hadn't even been asleep two hours. She immediately got up, left her hair down, and got dressed. It's not like she was going to get back to sleep tonight. Now she was scared. She left her D-Arc next to her futon and left her house, running as fast as she could to Takato's.

It took her about 20 minutes to get across town. She ran into the side alley, and saw his bedroom light dimly on. She picked up a pebble and threw it at his window. It hit with a 'chink'. Seconds later, Takato came to the window. Rika let out a breath of relief. Takato opened the window.

"Rika, what are you doing here? It's past midnight" he said.

"I…I was worried about you. Can I come in?" she asked. "Yeah, sure. I'll be right down" he said. It then occurred to her that she might have woken him up. Now she felt stupid with that possibility. He might've been finally getting some sleep and she woke him up all because she panicked. Thirty seconds later, the door opened, and Takato stood there. He was in his pajamas. He welcomed her in. They both went up to his room. Rika sat at his desk while Takato sat on his bed. Rika noticed his goggles and D-Arc hadn't moved. "I didn't wake you up, did I?" she asked. "No. I've been tossing and turning since you left."

"I'm sorry I came over unannounced like this. It's just that…" she couldn't find the right words. What would she say; 'I had a dream where you killed yourself so I had to come over'? Takato assumed what it was. "Is it about that kiss earlier? Because…"

"No, it's not that. I couldn't sleep. I was worried, that's all" she said. Now that he mentioned it…

"Look, about that kiss…" she searched for the right words, and decided that this had to come from the heart. "I first started coming over because I just didn't want you to end up like Jeri. I did what I did as a friend. And now…well, Renamon said something to me that got me thinking." she said. "Thinking what?" Takato asked. She got up, walked to his bed, and sat down next to him. She hugged him tight. "I've never been one for mushy parts, but I care about you, as more than a friend. You're not alone." she said. He returned the hug. "I can't imagine what you're going through, but I'm here for you." she said. Takato began crying. "I really miss him, Rika. I still can't think of how I'm going to go on without him" he said. "You'll find a way. You will, and I'll be here right beside you" she said. Takato got a hold of himself, and they released each other. "You think you can get some sleep?" she asked him. "I don't know yet" he said honestly. "Try. I'm not going anywhere" she said. He nodded, and lay down. Rika got up, and turned the light off. She sat down on the floor next to his bed, and sat there in the darkness. She silently thanked Renamon. Thanks to what she said, she had made the right choice. She made her feelings clear to Takato, and it looked like both of them were going to benefit because they opened their hearts to each other.

She dozed off after awhile, but woke up to Takato stirring in his sleep. "No…no" he murmured. "No…Guilmon…" he said in his sleep. Rika turned to him, and grasped his hand firmly. "Don't let it get to you. I'm here." she whispered to him. After several seconds, he calmed down, his steady breathing resumed. Rika smiled. She was helping him. This might work out after all…


	6. The Peace Before The Plummet

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 5 – The Peace Before The Plummet

Takato slowly came to. He was in bed. He looked over at his clock; 10:00 AM. Then, he realized Rika was beside his bed, grasping his hand, sleeping lightly. Another revelation came to him – he slept through the night. This was the best he physically and emotionally felt since…it happened. Rika was a light sleeper, and when his hand left her grasp, she woke up. "Morning" she said. "Morning" he said back. "Sleep well?" she asked. "Yeah, thanks to you" he said. Rika looked at the clock. "Your parents probably know I'm here." she said.

As if on cue, his mom slowly opened the door, and found that they were both awake. "Rika, can I see you downstairs for a minute?" she asked. Rika nodded, got up, and followed Mrs. Matsuki down to the dining room, where his dad was waiting, also.

"I checked on him several times last night and this morning. I found you sleeping next to him on the floor." she said. "I'm very sorry Mr. and Mrs. Matsuki. It won't happen again" Rika apologized. "Rika, we're not mad at you. Quite the opposite" his dad said. This caught Rika off guard. "Night after night, we'd hear him screaming as he woke up from another nightmare. We felt awful, not being able to help him sleep peacefully," his mom said. "This was the first night he didn't make a sound. We don't know how to thank you" she finished. "But, what made you come down here?" Mr. Matsuki asked.

Rika couldn't tell Takato straight out, but she felt she needed to tell his parents. "I couldn't sleep last night. I…had a nightmare, where Takato…overdosed. I woke up, and came over here as fast as I could. I was scared. When I got here and saw that he was okay, I couldn't just leave him. Thank you for understanding" she said. "No, thank you. Although we keep an eye on him through the night, thank you for acting on your instinct and coming to see him." his mom said. "I've realized I have feelings for him, Mr. and Mrs. Matsuki. I only wish it didn't take a situation like this to see that" she said. "Well, we're glad he has someone like you to help him." his dad said. Rika smiled. Takato came down after he had gotten dressed.

"We're not in trouble, are we?" he asked. "No, not at all" his mom told him. Takato looked relieved, and also looked a lot better due to the full night's sleep he got. "You two make a perfect couple, if you don't mind me saying so" his dad said. This caused both of them to blush a bit. "Dad, please" Takato moaned. But this was the best Rika had seen Takato in several days, so she didn't mind the 'peas in a pod' remarks. Besides, his dad could be right. Time would tell.

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Takato glanced at the clock on the far wall in Dr. Morgan's office. He had been here telling her the details of the past several days for about three hours.

"From what you've told me so far, it seems that things were looking up for you by then" she assumed.

"It's frightens me now; how quickly and drastically things can change" he replied, preparing to continue…

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After they had some breakfast, the two of them walked across town over to Rika's house. On the way, Rika was almost beaming. First off, she had never had a relationship like this before, and second, Takato was looking better and better all the time, now that he had his mind focused somewhere else other than on what had happened. She was so happy with how well she was helping him cope, and they had found each other's feelings along the way. But there was still the fact that sooner or later, Takato was going to have to turn around, face this tragedy, and accept his losses.

When they arrived at her house, her mom was out, but her grandma was home, and welcomed them in. Rika went into her closet, got out several tins, and opened them. "Here are my spare cards. Make yourself a deck so I can wipe the floor with you" she said mischievously. Takato smirked, and began sorting through the hundreds of the Digimon Queen's spares. "I'll be right back," she said. She went to the living room to talk to her grandmother.

"I can see right through you, Rika," her grandmother said, "You like him" she said. "It's a bit more than 'like' by now, Grandma. How am I gonna tell mom? I've never had anything close to a boyfriend before" Rika said. "Just tell her how you really feel about him" she said. 'Easier said than done' Rika thought to herself. "This all started because I wanted to help through the loss of Guilmon. How is that a normal way of starting a relationship?" Rika asked. "Dear, people find each other in all kinds of situations. Why should it matter HOW you found each other, when all that really matters is that you DID find each other. I think you two would make an excellent pair" her grandma said. 'That's three for three so far' Rika thought, remembering how Takato's parents supported the two of them together. "Think of it like this Rika; it's hardly a match made in heaven, but it's a match nonetheless" she said.

This is why Rika always came to her grandmother first – she always made sense of things. She returned to her room, where Takato was still going through her cards, astounded by all the rare and powerful cards that were her 'spares'. After a little help, he got a deck together, and they began a game. She whooped him in no time. "Care for another?" she asked. "Bring it" he said. They played again, and again – and again. Every time, Takato came closer to beating her. Finally, he squeezed out a victory.

"And it only took you a dozen tries" Rika teased. It was getting late, so they headed back to Takato's house. As they walked across town, both of them wondered where this relationship would take them…the possibilities. They were a block away from the Matsuki Bakery when they got a little hungry. They weren't really in the mood for bread, so they stopped in at a small food mart, and picked up some snacks.

They hadn't really considered that this wasn't the best part of town. They were the only ones in the mart, and had just gotten in line to check out when a man in a ski mask ran through the door. Before either of them had realized what had happened, he grabbed Rika by the throat, put a gun to her back, and glared at Takato and the cashier.

"Nobody move! I want the money out of the register. Now!"


	7. The Hand Fate Dealt You

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 6 – The Hand Fate Dealt You

Takato's heart pounded in fear.

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"It all happened so incredibly fast." Takato told Dr. Morgan, his voice starting to shake.

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The cashier was opening the drawer, and getting out the money that was inside, when they all heard sirens outside. Takato's eyes widened – he saw panic overtake the robber.

"Renamon!" Takato cried. Time slowed.

The robber pulled the trigger. Bang. Rika took in a shallow breath, and, free from the robber's grasp, collapsed to the floor. The robber aimed the gun at Takato and the cashier. Two more shots – one hit the cashier in the chest, and Takato was hit in the right shoulder. Both of them fell.

Renamon appeared behind the robber and wasted no time. She got his head firm within her grasp and snapped his neck. He dropped to the floor, dead.

Takato's vision cleared as he crawled toward Rika with his good arm. She breathed slowly. The front of her shirt was turning a crimson red. The bullet had hit her heart. Takato knelt at her side. "Hold on Rika. Hold on. Help's on the way. Please, hold on" Takato pleaded with her. But back in the deepest, darkest corner of his heart, he knew it was too late. Rika looked him in the eyes. She reached up for him, and he leaned in closer.

"F-find a way. Please…find a way" she whispered to him. "I love you" she said to him. She let out her last breath; her face went pale, her grip loosened, and her eyes closed for the last time.

In her last moments, Rika was not concerned for herself. She was scared for Takato. He was just beginning to get over the loss of Guilmon, and now he was going to lose her. She pulled him closer with her last ounces of strength. "F-find a way" she said. "Please…find a way" she asked of him. "I love you" she said, and then passed into the world beyond.

His heart…his heart and mind were pleading; screaming. Screaming no. No…no…

The world around him blurred and spun. His stomach began to churn. He dizzily got to his feet, and stumbled to the door of the food mart. He pushed the doors open and stood outside.

No…

Saw red and blue flashing lights. Heard someone say, "Freeze!" He stumbled another short step forward. He heard his parents scream his name. They must have heard the shots and come to see what was happening…

No…no…

His legs gave out; he fell to his knees, and threw up, falling to the concrete parking lot, as he lost touch with the rest of his body.

No…

He blacked out.


	8. Loss and Gain

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Chapter 7 – Loss and Gain

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"My parents told me after I passed out at the crime scene, I went into a coma for three days. To me, it seemed…instantaneous." he told Dr. Morgan.

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He heard voices in the blackness.

"What if one time you fade away and don't come back? I'm scared, Guilmon"

"Ta-ka-to-mon?"

"There are some mysteries we never solve, Takato"

"Guilmon…what have I done to you?"

"What's wrong? Your eyes are leaking, Takatomon"

"If you mention that dream again I'll send you to dream world for good!"

"Thanks for doing that, Takato. Wait, you didn't put any hearts or anything after it, did you?"

"If we're gonna be Digimon and his Tamer, you're gonna have to learn to listen to me more, Guilmon"

He woke up in the sheets of a hospital bed. He heard the beeping of a nearby heart monitor. The dizziness; the nausea…gone now.

But his mind was not at rest. Questions and thoughts about that night remained…why did they stop at that food mart for something to eat? His family owned a bakery. If they had just kept going…they were just a block away. Fate had dealt them a bad hand.

And now here he was…alone.

His mom and dad came into the room. They asked him how he was feeling. That was the worst question in the world. He didn't bother answering it.

"Takato…we're so sorry about-"

"Home…" he said just above a whisper. "I want to go home" he said. His parents nodded, said they would try to make that happen as fast as possible. Not as fast as he wanted. He heard the doctors cautioning them against removing him from medical care so soon after a coma…that he was emotionally unstable.

No…his emotions were stable…stable enough for what he just went through.

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"I didn't know what to do with myself. I felt so lost. Alone" he continued.

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Once he returned home, he began falling back down into the pit of despair that Rika had tried so hard to get him out of. He didn't eat; didn't sleep. At times he wondered if the last several days was just an illusion. Two days later, it got to it's worst point yet. Early one morning, he went to the bathroom, and got one of his dad's shaving razors. He went back to his room, and stood looking out the window, his back to the door. He took the razor and dug it into his right wrist. This physical pain felt better than the emotional pain he was lost in. Suddenly, he heard his bedroom door open.

"Takato?" his dad called from the doorway. "Yeah?" he said, keeping the razor and bleeding wrist out of view, but didn't turn toward his dad. "Listen, son. I know it's hard. It's one of the hardest things you'll have to deal with. Just know…we're here for you. Don't be afraid to come to us if you need anything. Alright?" he asked. Takato stood there for several moments. "Yeah" he said. His dad slowly closed the door.

The events of the past days flashed before Takato.

"Find a way. Please…find a way"

Takato dropped the now bloody razor. He stared at the cut he had made, as blood trickled down his hand.

This was a way…but not the way Rika would've wanted. Takato cleaned the cut and bandaged it. He picked up his phone and called Henry.

"Hello?" Henry said upon picking up.

"Hey Henry." he greeted. "Takato" Henry said, sounding surprised to hear from him. "Look, I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am for everything that's happened." Henry said. "Henry, look. I…I need help. Awhile back you said you knew a psychiatrist nearby?" he asked him. There was a short pause in the conversation. "Yeah. Yeah, Dr. Morgan. I'll give you the number"

He called and set up an appointment for two days later. He went downstairs and told his parents about his wrist, that he was very sorry, and that he was going to get help.

"You made the right choice, son" his dad said. "There's no shame in admitting you need help" his mom told him.

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"That was two days ago." Takato said. He looked at the scar on his wrist. "Now here I am" he said. Tears pricked his eyes, but he wiped them away. "When I came here today, I told myself I wouldn't cry. I've already done enough of that" Takato said.

"You don't know that. Takato, if you need to let something out…" Dr. Morgan said.

"I didn't come here to let something out. I came here for answers." he said, pausing to think of what to say next. "My mom always used to tell me, whenever I lose something, I gain something in return, even though I may not notice it immediately. I've been searching and searching for the past days – what have I gained from this?" he asked. "Takato, there are a lot of times I wish there was a manual of every single problem that people have that I could just open up and tell them what to do. But everyone is different. What I can tell you is this: You still have people who love you, who care about you. There are some people who've come in here with absolutely nothing left. You've lost very dear loved ones, and you decided to come here on your own. Your mom and dad are there for you. I know you feel lost. That's why you're here. You're not as alone as you think. I know if you try with all your heart, you'll find what you've gained, and your way; the way that Rika wanted" Dr. Morgan said. Takato lay there for several moments silently. He sat up and got off the couch. "Thank you, Doctor" he said. Dr. Morgan stood up, and shook his hand slowly. "Good luck, Takato" she said. He walked out. On his way out of the building, he thought back to earlier today, before he left for his appointment. He didn't tell Dr. Morgan what happened that morning…

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He got up that morning and got dressed. His wrist still throbbed lightly. He still wondered if this was the right way.

"Takato" a familiar voice said from behind him. He turned.

"Renamon" he said, surprised. Rika's partner walked toward him. Standing in front of him, she towered over him a good 6 inches. Takato noticed, in her hand, she held Rika's D-Arc.

"Despite everything that's happened, Takato, you are still a Digimon Tamer. And I am a Digimon without one. I offer myself…to you" she said.

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He shook his head in disbelief. He walked right past her out of his room, not looking back.

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At first, he was disgusted by Renamon's offer, because he thought it was dishonoring Rika's memory. But now, as he walked home, he looked at it differently. What if he refused, and they went their separate ways? He still wasn't sure what to do with himself, and what would become of Renamon? Maybe, just maybe, together they could find their way. But he was having trouble fighting off the thought that doing so would be 'replacing' Guilmon, something that he never wanted to even think about doing.

He was still lost, and without a very special friend, he would remain that way. Yes, his parents would be there for him, but they couldn't be the companionship that he needed…

The companionship that a Digimon could be.

He got home, went up to his room and shut the door. He had spent an awful lot of time in here the past couple weeks. For the first time since everything happened, he glanced at his D-Arc on the corner of his desk. It hadn't moved since he returned from Egypt. At first, everything after that seemed to happen so fast.

Now it seemed like an eternity ago. He slowly walked over to his desk and stared at his Digivice. The gold ring was gone – replaced by the original red circle. He picked it up, and stared at it; seeing his reflection on the blank screen.

"Renamon" he said, under a whisper. He didn't turn, but the short 'hiss' sound let him know that the kitsune Digimon had materialized a few feet behind him. He still didn't turn. "When you made me that offer this morning…you didn't think that it would be disrespecting Rika?" he asked.

"I had thought about that long and hard for a few days, while you were in the hospital, Takato. I've come to a single conclusion. With the situation we have ourselves here, I honestly believe that it's what she would've wanted." Renamon said. Takato turned to Renamon.

"I accept." he said. His D-Arc's screen came to life. The compass hologram appeared and rotated for a few seconds, focused on Renamon, and dissipated. The Digivice beeped an acknowledgement signal. It was now connected to Renamon. Takato walked toward Renamon and embraced her. She returned it. In his heart, he knew this is what was to be gained.

Together, they would find their path.


	9. Epilogue

LOSS AND GAIN

By milesprower06

Epilogue

4 MILES OUTSIDE CAIRO, EGYPT

THREE MONTHS LATER…

Takato had been planning this for several days. Everything was prepared. He descended into the tomb where his life changed three months ago. He had a backpack on, and Henry, Terriermon, and Renamon kept pace behind him. His D-Arc was clipped to his pants, swinging lightly with every step he took. They soon came to the ancient alter where they fought off BlackWarGreymon. It seemed so long ago…

The center granite tile directly at the foot of the stairs had been removed; under it was sand that hadn't been touched in centuries. Takato knelt down in front of it, removed the backpack, and began digging a small hole in the sand with his hands. When he determined it deep enough, he unzipped the pack. He took out an empty tin, and removed the lid. Next, he took out several small sheets of paper with various drawings and statistics of a familiar red Digimon, bound together with a rubber band. He set those in the tin. He reached into the pack again, and retrieved another item. A D-Arc Digivice; with a blue circle around the screen. He gently set that in the tin on top of the sheets of paper. He put the lid of the tin on, and set it in the hole. Then he slowly began filling the hole with sand again. When it was leveled out, Takato removed the last item from his pack – the stone granite tile that had been removed. He gently set it down from where he had taken it. Only this time, it had a beautiful engraving on it. He had that done several days ago. He didn't say where he got the tile. He stood up, and read the engraving on the floor. He smiled. At long last, he could genuinely smile again.

TO A TAMER AND DIGIMON WHO SHALL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN

He stood there for several moments more, then turned and left the tomb with his friends. At last, his mind was at ease.


End file.
